Following a romance in my early twenties with an older man who, I eventually accepted, was simply at a different stage of life, I went through a series of short relationships of varying significance.I met lovely men—many of whom remain my friends—but by my mid-thirties, I still hadn’t met anyone with whom I felt that same degree of connection and passion I had known with my first love.He claimed that they were screaming, “I’m not getting on.I don’t want to get my weave wet” (insert Shanaynay voice).His schoolmate then added that the only girls Richard finds attractive have long blonde hair and blue eyes. In that case, I was not shocked that Richard did not find any black girls “attractive” because I too have never met a black girl with natural long blonde hair and blue eyes.That same evening, Richard laughed heartily as he told the joke that black women died on the Titanic because they refused to get on emergency rafts.Theoretically, the online world offers greater odds of finding a partner than does a chance meeting at a party.Being online is like going to a party without encountering all the people who trap you in boring conversations.

I signed up for Tinder and Bumble—two apps with simple interfaces that invite users to swipe on pictures of people they find attractive—as well as Ok Cupid.While none of these particular filters are racially charged, this feature, along with Highblood's “Rise above all,” slogan, is definitely sending out some MAJOR elitist, cult-tastic vibes.Eng, however, continued to defend the app, saying, “We are not racist because science has conclusively proven that genetically… Finding someone who will love you despite your physical \"flaws,\" idiosyncrasies and emotional wounds is hard enough without imposing limitations based on arbitrary race categories!That wonderful time of year had come and I decided to host the festivities.